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Dead Alice posted:Why can't we do all of them? Either at once, or sequentially. FOOL! The universe cuold IMPLODE AGAIN if we did that!! best just to vote and hope democrasy rings truue for Elf School. i dont knoe why telling beazie mecha snatter mum does spleeing with many humans would suprise him. evryone know shim slut.
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| # ? Dec 16, 2007 22:59 |
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The audience seem to be wanting to do Wiggling He! They come up to the
stage! They gather, they swarm! They advance! They advance SP! They
close in on Beazie and are about to hoist him up and wiggle he like
nobody ever was priorly wiggled... but then suddenly a booming
authoritative voice shout, "STOP!" A silence falle over the theatre.  oo-er.   it is the Head of year, Richard Burton. Using a series of head waggles and creative swerving, he ushers Beazie away from Pete and out of the room. Behind him, he calle, "Continue the Snatavity." and the two of them gone. In the Head's Office... "Beazie Toiz," Head saye in him deep and boo ming voice. "What you did today was a humiliation upon the school. But I do not think it can have come unprovoked. Have a candy-cane." Beazie has one, they are one himme desk and Beazie like's them. they make him feel all light-headed. "Now Beazie. Why don't you tell me what happened? Why did you feel the need to embarass yourself like that?" "Not embarrassed," BEazie, "they deserved it." "Why did they deserve it?" "I... Kringle said..." BEazie seems to be having trubble expressing himself. "And Rose is a bossy cow anyway. And anyway! He probably liked it, he's got his attention now, hasn't he." "Who has? Everyone has their chance on Snatavity night," say Head. "It is everyone's chance to shine, not one person's. You can't have all the attention to yourself just by pushing over some boards. They'll be put back up by now and the play will be carrying on. They'd even had time to put two of them back up and in position by the time I arrived, they were back in position to the pixel, with the coats and donkey set up in exactly the same way as well. They did it between you pushing things and me arriving. That is how it happened." "Yeah," Beazie say, "but the attention isn't on the play, it's scattered about, like he said. I wasn't even going to do anything but then he kept telling me that Rose was laughing at me because she got the part and I didn't..."  "Beazie," saye HEad, "has someone been taunting you?" "He kept saying everyone hated me, and I didn't believe him at first but then there was proof, every time!" Head looke serious. "If you mean that another student has been saying these things to you, then that is a matter I take very seriously. What has been going on?"  "He said Kringle thought I was some kind of moron, and I said he was a commy, and his beard made him look stupid anyway. But then in Beard Growing, he was really smug about having a beard and beard powers, and I got all embarassed and messed up the beard growing. And it never got better!! And after that he kept telling me little things I could do to get my own back and make it even, but they kept going wrong and I never got even, and he said I'd have to do bigger and bigger things so that if they went wrong a little bit then at least there was still some left that worked... but, but every time he would tell the teacher I did all those things! And, I did, but, they were his things!! And I kept listening to him because he always said that he had to look like he wasn't my friend so that he could keep helping me, and... and then he said we needed to do something really big." "You let someone talk you into spoiling the Snatavity play? Oh, Beazie, why did you listen to someone like that?" Beazie look up. "Noe, not the Snatavity. That's just what I was doing. It's what he's doing that's big. He said tonight would be the best day to really get my own back, and at the same time, while the attention's scattered around, then, you see?" "No," saye Head, looking very serious indeed. "Well, it was a distraction, he said. And while I was doing that..." A sort of shadow of foreboding fall upon the office. It shaped like an advent calendar chocolate. "I think you'd better take me to himme," saye the Head. And today's chocolate is in shape of a present again, with the ribbon that made it look like either really thin ribbon or a really big present. But this time the present is openning. Oe! Who is this running down the corridor towards the Head's office? :o 
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| # ? Dec 16, 2007 23:46 |
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bowy? no, micke jaggar?
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| # ? Dec 16, 2007 23:56 |
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Oh noes, it be Pat Sharpe. This madhouse isn't much fun 
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| # ? Dec 16, 2007 23:57 |
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I suspect, LEGOLAS? buml0r...is lapland in middle erf?
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| # ? Dec 17, 2007 00:04 |
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Comix Bitch posted:I suspect, LEGOLAS? No that would be the equator and here we have snow and not sand, must be top earth
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| # ? Dec 17, 2007 00:11 |
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Buml0r posted:OPEN THE PRESENT BEAZIE! IT MIGHT BE AN AK-47 OR SOMETHING ELSE USEFUL! quote:It's Russel Brand. He's gone Super Saiyan, I guess.
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| # ? Dec 17, 2007 00:31 |
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That am Gobbelin King! He remind me of the baby and the MAGIC DANSE.
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| # ? Dec 17, 2007 03:08 |
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RichLather posted:That am Gobbelin King! He remind me of the baby and the MAGIC DANSE. This man knows his Bowie. NOOOOO dont eat the cholckat, it's made of dreems and full of worms and you'll end up with all yourmemories piled on your back and you love your dolly don't you yes yes don't feorget your dolly. D: D: D:
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| # ? Dec 17, 2007 03:32 |
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Oe mates I think something strange is happening. I was feeling a bit
christmassy what with the traditional Snatavity and so on, but this is
getting a bit odd now. I mean, we've got Beazie saying that someone's
been making him do bad things so that they can do REALLY bad things,
and we've got the Snowman here to talk about important Topick's, but
mainly I think I'm worried because of this thing about Dooper and him
maybe having been killed once before, even though he's Still Alive! And thta newspaper cutting just chilled me to the boan, m8s and ladym8s. The picture of the person who was seen at the seen of the criem is just... oh I will show you and then you will see what I mean about it being just about as bad a person as could possibly have been there. Ok here we goe... here it is... ...I CAN'T! I daren't show you!! ooaa I am in an Guish!!! let's look for the next door and perhaps I can bring myself to my sense's. Dore Seventeen We're stuck in the Head's office as a sort of rumbling is going on around us. There's a strange deep rumbly sound like a rumbling sort of rumbly, and things are going shake shake on the mantelpiece and that. What going on? Beazie is here, so he can't be causing any trouble. But oe! A bloke is running towards us he have big weirdy hair and he's all strung up in a really thin clothes and he's scary mates he's scary! He's sort of alluring BUT SCARY  Oe, it' David Bowy again! I think he is in character from one of his films, where he played Mauve the Mincing Sky Jester. Helloed, David Bowy again. "Right! How about now! I've waited years for the opportunity, please tell me I didn't show up too early again? I can feel rumbling and everything, this must be it, surely?" "What?" say the Head. "What are you here to see, David Bowy?" "I - I can't tell you! My friend told me never to meddle with the past! I can only observe!" "Why are you hear?" Richard Burton Head say. "To see it happen. To see the moment when history was changed forever. The co-ordinates were very carefully worked out - if I haven't missed it, then on this day will come one of the great Christmatic events, an event which will shape Christmas for the rest of time!" Oe mates, something big is going down, and only a handful of people seem to know about it, and they're not telling us what it is! Let's console ourselves by eating the chocolate. It is hidden about Bowy's person somewhere. If you can guess where, you get the chocolate. OH I CAN'T DO THIS ANY MORE LOOK!!!!  But it can't be true!!! We would have been there!! You are being framed m8s! I'm so sorry I don't know what is happening!! I'll fight for you m8s! I mean unless I have to go out of my way obviously, but if you are under suspicion of being on the scene of a murder that never happened, then if I can do anything, anything at all, without really putting myself out, then I shall! You have an alibi m8s, you have been with me all this time!! I WON'T LET THEM GET YOU!! D:
Buml0r fucked around with this message at Dec 17, 2007 around 23:54
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| # ? Dec 17, 2007 23:51 |
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but... but... I WAS NEVER THERE
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 00:00 |
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Oh, no, no, bowy can keep that chocolate i mean no one says the chocolate has to be eet
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 00:04 |
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THAT'S ME?!!!!! WHAT DO I HAVE TO DO WITH THIS TRAVESTY! WHERE IS THE CHAWLKILIT e: (IN THE ORB? CAN I HAVE?)
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 00:06 |
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Oh god is the chocolate in the bowie-crotch? Oh please tell me it is!. 
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 00:28 |
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oe. The chocolut must be hidden in Bowy's generous arm-ruffles. This distresses me, I didn't know that I would be fraimed for murder when all I wanted was to open dores! If we show the authorities the real Dooper (he is alive?), are we still in trouble? Or is is it something more sinisteer? And where did they get that picture of me! I have a hundred better ones they could use if they just ascked.
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 00:38 |
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Is it in Bowy's hair? That's big hair I bet it is.
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 03:00 |
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I am NOT eating chocolate out of David Bowie's codpiece AGAIN.
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 03:19 |
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ArthurKOT posted:I am NOT eating chocolate out of David Bowie's codpiece AGAIN. Wot again? This happeneded before?
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 03:27 |
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It's in the ball! No! The hair! No wait! The Codpiece! OH GOD I CAN"T WATCH!
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 03:32 |
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It's gotta be under that there chin.
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 03:44 |
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yeesh, they really got me bad side that day...
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 04:12 |
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I say the chocolate's in Bowie's mouth and he's sucking on it.
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 04:15 |
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I think it's in his eye POKE IT POKE IT POKE IT
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 04:18 |
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The dore is in the Bowy cod-piece, and it are a chocolate Reminder Of The Babe. There may also be a chocolate Hoggle in his bubble, but this is pure speculation.
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 04:46 |
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ArthurKOT posted:I am NOT eating chocolate out of David Bowie's codpiece AGAIN. 
EVERYTHING tastes better after being in Bowie's crotch. It is something
they're too embarrassed to say on Food Network, except for Alton Brown,
who is the only one to admit it because it is a SCIENTIFIC FACT.
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 04:51 |
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Kat Delacour posted:The dore is in the Bowy cod-piece, and it are a chocolate Reminder Of The Babe.
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 06:40 |
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moana posted:wot babe?
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 07:06 |
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Draconi Ann posted:The babe wit the powa. wot powa?
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 07:33 |
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He's got a necklace thingy and the chocolate lies within
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 07:44 |
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Edit: Whoops! O no we are in for it and no mistake the elf polise will be here soon and we will be NICKED. Maybe we shold hold Davie Bowy for randsome?
Robotic T-Rex fucked around with this message at Dec 18, 2007 around 16:26
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 16:23 |
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Dead Alice posted:wot powa? da powa ov Vooodoooo Robotic T-Rex posted:O no we are in for it and no mistake the elf polise will be here soon and we will be NICKED. We may have to legg it away on ours toes! Also, I think choklit is the Bowy Gobbling king fine necklays be caus that is looking pritty nommy to me,
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 16:41 |
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Radio PhoolCat posted:da powa ov Vooodoooo Regla de Ocha? ĄDios Mio!
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 17:13 |
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it was up him bum. nobody guessed so you all get to eat it! Dore 18!! O such christmas tidings are taking place around us m8s! Because down in the school grounds standing on the field are Snatrer, and his bestest mates Duddles and Dooley, and even stupid Puffy is here and they're all looking up into the sky. Why? Because LOOK.  Oh MATES. Someone has delivered a present to Elf School It's a huge box, sort of done up like a christmas present but without any wrapping paper on it, and it is in the sky, and it is OPENING. But there's something sinister abouit the purpley colour scheme and the way it's making the whole world rumble and everything go mad. Sudednly from one of the most toppiest most topmost of towers bursts SNOWMAN and BURGESS MEREDITH THE GRAND HIGH ELF!!!  And woosh they come soreing down through the moonlit sky, and everyone goes WHOE because there's BURGESS and you almost NEVER get to see him, like once ever if you're lucky, and he's obviously gr8 old m8s with Snowman. They land, and Burgess is hurrying towards the big box in the sky obviously about to sort it out, when he looks down, and...  "Oe," he says. "My child. That scarf, where did you get it?" Snatter point to Snowman who is standing very still a distance away, looking up at the sky. Dooper comes running over to ask what's going on. "Just a moment Dooper," says Burgess. "My child, I have seen that scarf before. Well, in my way." "Have you?" say Snatter, who isn't sure what's so special about this silly old scarf anyway. "I have conversed with the future, young lad," say Burgess. "And I have seen that a significant event will take place one day, in the far, far future..." oo everything go wobbely and we're seeing a flash forwards  "My dear friend Snowman will meet a young boy, not unlike yourself. And together they will journey to Snowman's Land, where will be waiting the Chosen One of prophecy. And he will give him a present.  And inside that present will be...  ...your scarf." Snatter omgs. "Do you know what that means, m'boy?" say burgess "Er, no," say Snatter "It means the prophecy must be true! It means my future-foresight is not flawed, as even the greatest of us must occasionally consider. It means that all the great Christmatic events as they have been foreseen do indeed hold togther. It means that the future of Christmas is good and pure and that the Chosen One will indeed someday come to us... but it also means that it hangs in the balance." "It does?" saye Snatter. "Yes, I'm afraid it does. That present in the sky is not one for which anyone has asked. I am afraid terrible things may happen if it were to open, but we here are powerless to close it. Now! Dooper, what did you..." but dooper is not listening. Snowman seems to want to shake his hand. Dooper isn't sure why he would want to do that right now when it looks like bad things are about to happen.  bit strange isn't it. snowman almost looks sad. like he remembers him from when he was... wel i was going to say "alive" but he IS alive i mean look there he is, and... ...i don't noe. i don't noesy. what's happening lads i feel a bit odd again. like last year y'noe? Chocolate in shape of a sort of lingering nostalgic sadness. 
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 18:12 |
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I gues s sense none others m8s wants that chocolate i'll take it?? Nom? I hope snaters going to be ok! (I missed the last calendar, is it saved anywhere besides archives?) Edit: I dont liek the tatse of this chocolate
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 22:42 |
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I'd like a chocklit I bet it taste like bitter tears. nomnomnom my am vry worride about dooper and the snoman tho m8s
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 23:25 |
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Maybe is dooper now a special ghost? Maybe he really is dead!
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| # ? Dec 18, 2007 23:28 |
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Coffee Quack posted:Maybe is dooper now a special ghost? Or a ZOMBY. He is not roting or nything tho so maby not. I dont want bowi ass chokolit but i will take the lingerie sadnes one om nom nom nom
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| # ? Dec 19, 2007 00:35 |
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Coffee Quack posted:Maybe is dooper now a special ghost? No, I'm really sure he isn't dead! I mean wouldn't he be even slightly scary or see-through or put-hand-through? There would be some air of deadness about him I'm sure, like his clothes smell old or he does scary things. But noe! He's a lovely cuddly old man and I don't know how he could be anything but alive and very nice! Uab posted:(I missed the last calendar, is it saved anywhere besides archives?) i can't pm or email you! you will have to come to me instead
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| # ? Dec 19, 2007 02:09 |
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Buml0r posted:All I want for christmas is an avatar sized Goblin King Bowie.
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| # ? Dec 19, 2007 08:00 |
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I really did think it was in his hair. I'm not eatin it from the bum. Hey Buml0r! This is genius! Thanks!
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| # ? Dec 19, 2007 11:03 |
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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Advent calendar again! Let's open more dores!