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Please don't be putting chocolates in bums anymore thanks
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| # ? Dec 19, 2007 12:23 |
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Why snoweman get so skinny?
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| # ? Dec 19, 2007 13:48 |
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RichLather posted:Why snoweman get so skinny? Global warming :/
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| # ? Dec 19, 2007 17:32 |
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Buml0r, you are one of my favorite people on this forum, and it is a highly exclusive list.
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| # ? Dec 19, 2007 17:59 |
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Jormagund posted:Global warming :/ That and he get's exercise flying around. Dore 19 Where is dore nineteen?? The Head and Burgess and Dooper are looking up in the sky (also David Bowy who is nearby), so let's try up there m8s. OHHH MY! Look who is up in the sky, standing on one of the towers of Elf School!  It is Pete, and he has a hand raised to the sky towards the big present! Could it be that he is controlling it?? And in his other hand he has something but again, I can't see what it is! But Snatter can't even see Pete! He doesn't know Pete is the one opening the big present in the sky that will make everything in the world go wrong! He can just see there's some figure up there. "He must be stopped," say Head. "Yes," say Burgess, "but even that I fear would be too late. The spellcasting is begun; Pandora's present is already opening. Nothing we have in our arsenal could contain a destructive force so great. What horrors lie within that giant box in the sky I cannot tell!" "What shall we doo!" say Snowman! "First," say Head, "I must decide what to do with - - - BEAZIE!" Beazie gone! Beazie! Where is Beazie! OE NOE HE'S UP ON THE ROOF WITH PETE! Lightning is going everywhere now mates and - - oh look, the lightning is a dore and there's lightning shaped chocolate inside, it's very long and thin and travelling at the speed of light so let's break bits off as it passes. *snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**snap**sna p**snap**snap* *omnomnom**omnomnom**omnomnom**omnomnom**omnomnom**omnomnom**omnomnom**omnomnom**omnomnom**omnomnom* *omnomnom**omnomnom* Beazie looks like he doesn't know what to do but he's going up to Pete anyway and going "What can I do to help!" And Pete goe "GET DOWN, CUR!" And Pete smack him to him bumme!!! :O :O :O :O time was when i would have hehe'd to see him be smacked to him bum. but now i don't know, there's something a bit scary about all this. Beazie certainly thinks so, because he SPRAWL on the rooftop of the tower, and he look up at Pete...  And he have ANGAR in him's eyes. Beazie try to stand, and he advance on Pete. Oe Pete and Beazie, what are you going to do! The big present is opening and you are destroying CHristmas!! And a bolt of lightning illuminate Pete and... OE NOE!!  It is the EVIL CHRISTMAS SPIDOR he hold!! The evil twin of the Christmas Spidor that bit Snatter and gave him Christmas Powarze and made him into Snatter!! The evil Christmas spidor!! That means Pete is... Sly Peter!! The Antisnatter!!! 
Buml0r fucked around with this message at Dec 20, 2007 around 00:11
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| # ? Dec 19, 2007 23:58 |
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Buml0r posted:
OE NOES  He does not age well. :O
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 00:19 |
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NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ... ... ... I didn't get any chocolate 
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 01:59 |
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omgodz the snowman 
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 02:24 |
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this chocolate tastes like sparks, ouch!
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 02:34 |
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this chocolate tastes like sparks, yumm!
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 09:53 |
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legalcondom posted:I didn't get any chocolate what's the matter, can't you snap off chocolate and consume it at the speed of light like the rest of us? MOH
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 16:05 |
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I feel both honored and disturbed when reading this OP. Good show mate.
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 16:15 |
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You fellows! What mysteries await us as December draws on and Christmas
ambles ever nearer? Last year we found out the origin of Snatter birth
and saw all the Christmasses past and future merge together into one
big Quantum Chocolate, and all sorts of other Christmas Origins. This year looke to be no different! Because nowe we know we are looking at the school daye's of the Antisanter, and his first villainry! Certainly his first villainry versus Snatter anyway! Peter Schwartz, known by many cultures as Sly Pete, is THE ANTISANTA, the dark and devilrous boy who was bitten by a venemous Antichristmas spider who had Antichristmas powarze! Hime stands on the rooftop of the castle m80s and is opening Pandora's Present. See, because he is the Antisnatter, he delivers presents BUT IN AN EVIL WAY! Beazie is still advancing on him, and on hims's face is torment and indecision!! But nothing can be done about the present! Evil and chaos is about to spill forth and there is nothing the HEad can do, nothing Burgess the Head Elf can do, nothing David Bowie can do (Bowy is still here hanging around I think). Everyone is powerless!!! but then, Snatter suddenly theinks of something.  Snatter RUN OFF to the stables where Dooper taught him to fly and to do the Dooper Looper. He run through the castle to get there, and on the way grabs the wrapping paper (covered in stardust snowflakes) from the big roll of endless wrapping paper! And he RUN through the castle, with wrapping paper streaming and flapping out behind him!!! He gets outside, hooks up the reindeer to a slé, attaches the end of the wrapping paper to it... AND FLY!! SNATTER WITH A PLAN! GO SNATTER! SNATTER FLIES THROUGH THE AIR WITH HIM'E SLEY!!  Everyone is watching Snatter! They know what he's doing! They know! "KNOCK EM DEAD KID" shout Dooper, "KNOCK EM DEAD!" "Merry Christmas!!" shout Burgess, because it's the only thing he's used to shouting. "NO ONE WOULD HAVE BELIEVED," say the giant hovering head of actor Sir Richard Burton, "IN THE LAST YEARS OF THE NINETEENTH CENTURY THAT HUMAN AFFAIRS WERE BEING WATCHED FROM THE TIMELESS WORLDS OF SPACE. NO-ONE COULD HAVE DREAMED THAT WE WERE BEING SCRUTINIZED..." and he goe on like this because he only has a few phrases he can say but they are powerful phrases and hime voice is booming. But Snatter is there going FLY FLY FLY over to the big present!! And he is flying now underneath the big opening evil present!! Look what he's trying to do! He's trying to wrap the present!! OF COURSE! HE'S SANTA CLAUS! HE'S KING OF ALL PRESENTS!! NO PRESENTS CAN DEFEAT SANTA-BLIMMIN-CLAUS!! But it's going to be tough to wrap that thing up. He's going to have to do some tricky manoovering! ...OF COURSE!  THE SUPER DOOPER LOOPER! IT'S THE ONLY WAY!! I never thought I'd see an actual time when the Super Dooper Looper actually was the only way! But this is it! Dooper's super-special trick he taught Snatter is going to save the day!! Or is it? Snatter couldn't do the Super Dooper Looper, even Dooper can't always do it! It's a really hard thing to do, the reindeer always pussy out at the last minute! COME ON SNATTER. COME ON SNATTER!! Today's chocolate is Snatter and all his reindeer suping dooping looping. EAT UP GENTS I can't wait to see if he does it! Down on the ground, Dooper's cheers are loudest.
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 23:26 |
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I think we should petition the English language to change out sleigh for slé, because it's clearly a superior word. Dinner Tré The sky was Gré Come out and Plé
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 23:43 |
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Coffee Quack posted:I think we should petition the English language to change out sleigh for slé, because it's clearly a superior word. Wot you sé? Anyway, this choklits makes my tummy all floaty. I think it's still looping in theres.
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| # ? Dec 20, 2007 23:49 |
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I atem a leg of each of the raindear and I haff to say that that Vixen tastes the bestest.
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 00:44 |
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its over 12night where I live. More dores?
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 05:12 |
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Go Snatter goe!
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 08:47 |
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What happens if we go and open a door while you're asleep, and then carefully tuck it closed again? I bet you'd never know!
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 09:07 |
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Coffee Quack posted:What happens if we go and open a door while you're asleep, and then carefully tuck it closed again? I bet you'd never know! Only he knows where the dores are! There's tricks to finding them, you see.
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 09:11 |
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Coffee Quack posted:What happens if we go and open a door while you're asleep, and then carefully tuck it closed again? I bet you'd never know! That souns like the work of Sly Petey to me! NO PRECENSE FOR YUO
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 09:17 |
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OMGs m80s this are sooo excitingness!!! I knew Snatters could Save him Day but I never guessd it would be as brilliant in its epicosity!!! there isn't a biggy nuff for what I feels right now.Thanks to you Bulm3r for bringing the AWESOME home! ps - I read "SNATTER" as "SHATNER" at one point because i r dum 
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 09:22 |
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Coffee Quack posted:What happens if we go and open a door while you're asleep, and then carefully tuck it closed again? I bet you'd never know! Buml0r might not, but Snatter would 
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 10:22 |
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Radio PhoolCat posted:ps - I read "SNATTER" as "SHATNER" at one point because i r dum This is somehow a bad thing?
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 13:29 |
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Buml0r dont leev us now!!
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 21:17 |
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I am all of an excitement! gosh what a loverly story! but who would have guessed pete would turn out to be pete? that is certainly a thing I did not exapcect! and I argee that slé is be far a better word for it. I really think that we should do what they do in mexico and just use é for all "ay" sounds.
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 22:52 |
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Dead Alice posted:Buml0r might not, but Snatter would Yeah, watch out. Snatter might give you cole if you do dore without some of us! :o Oe m8s, oe m80 m8s!! Door number 21 brings terrible drama and catastrophe and that doesn't it! I mean we're right in the middle of endgame here! Snatter is zooming up trying to do the Super Dooper Looper! Will he do it?? I mean he's never managed before! He could only just do the normal Dooper Looper! This one's Super! How will he be super!! Oe Noe Mates!!  He faille!!! D: The reindeer got all scared and they couldn't do it!!! Now the world's most evil christmas present will keep opening until horrible horrors spill out and awful Christmastide Chaos spills out over the world!! Evil will infect the Yuletide cheer! Maybe the original Christmas Tree will turn into an Antichristmas Tree, and the terrible dark antichristmas matter will infect all around it, and everyone will turn into zombies and start eating children on christmas morning!!! THIS IS TERRIBLE!! SNATTER HAS FAILED TO SAVE CHRISTMAS!! Dooper cheered so loud, and Snatter could hear himme's happy lovely voice all the way in the sky, but he still couldn't do it for Dooper! Oe noe!!  What's this? Snowman has drawn out from inside his snow... THE QUANTUM CHOCOLATE!! Last year, if you don't remember, all the Christmases of the past and present and future became sort of intertwined, and all the potential futures and pasts manifested in the form of one very special advent calendar chocolate. The Herald of Christmas ate that, but because it is a quantum chocolate and is basically infinite and made out of infinite different dimensions of itself, the Snowman was able to save one when he held it, and he's kept it cold inside his snow all this time. He look sadly at it, and then he grip it tightly in hime's hand. The magical space glow lights up his arm and the whole of Snowman. And then...  Snowman begin to run out of school grounds, out into snowe, faster and faster, bounding and jumping, until suddenly the spacetime continuum break down around him and SNowman VANISH, in a loud CRACK of TIME!! A great darkness sort of FLASH OUT, and the light goes BOOOO and everything getting sucked towards where he was, like a bit of the universe has got cancelled out and so everything else has to rush in to fill the gap!! You're getting a bit sucked there yourself m8s, mind out!! whew i don't noe what's going on there chocolate is of an infinitessimally small picoblip of unspace. It's actually really cool, you put it on your tongue and it sort of spread out flavour like it was noe NOE!!! OE NOE GOD JESUS NOE WHAT IS THAT IN THE SKY NOE DON'T!!!! IT IT CAN'T BE NOT AGAIN NOEE!!!  NOOOEEEE M8888S!!!!
Buml0r fucked around with this message at Dec 22, 2007 around 00:29
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| # ? Dec 21, 2007 23:56 |
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you know what to do WIGGLE HE
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 01:01 |
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Maybe give him some eggnog and rum, but then it looks like a robot so the rum might not do anything
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 04:17 |
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Oh God we need to get that mother of he, perhaps she can save us, or at least give us head.
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 09:54 |
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OH NOE BOWY SAVE US!! 
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 19:34 |
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OOOEE M888888S I'm REALLY scared now, Mecha-Snatter is back from the evil dimension of unholy fear and terror, and he's about to run rampant here in the real world!! I mean this is... oh godd  Puffy is looking up at the sky, terrified of what he is seeing! He's actually dressed as Mecha Snatter, but he's never SEEN him before! Only heard of him in legends! I mean he's more of an archetype than anything, nobody actually believes in Mecha Snatter! Not properly anyway! He's more an amalgamation of different robot legends from around the world, unified by coca-cola ads and yuletide movies! But no, he's REAL and HERE HE IS, BLASTING through the sky, in a blaze of sparkly hate! On the rooftop, the Antisnatter is chortling to himmeslef  But Beazie, now completely sick of being used, is advancing on Antisnatter with hatred in his eyes!! What is he going to do!?? What is he going to do?!! He grabbe Antisnatter's foot, and summoning up all the anger inside him....  WIGGLE HE!! WIGGLE HE!!! This is the most epic wiggle he I've EVER SEEN! He's not just being wiggled, he's practically being waggled!! It's a super wigglewaggle attack!! He's being brandished and flourished like a wigglywaggle baton at the waggly head of a wiggle procession and Beazie is the wagglemaster! Look at him wiggle! See he waggle! Oh heavens above, the wag-wiggle wiggly wagglewiggling that's happening about us tonight!! Little poos are shooting out of Antisnatter as he is wiggled! No! Not poos! Little chocolates in the shape of little poos! Where are you m8s, you can try them first to see if they're actually chocolates or poos. Oh the terror as the great Mecha Snatter, several times the size of Elf School, comes hurtling down through the sky, blasting everything with his enormous gun and carving great big scoops out of the landscape, now stamping and smashing around!! Everything is being destroyed!!! And beside us is the tiny point, in the shape of the Quantum Chocolate, where Snowman disappeared out of time! M8s, i want you to try these chocolates and... Oe noe!!  M8s!! You're getting sucked really in! Be careful! Stop getting sucked in!! OE NOE!! M8S!! M8888888S!!!!!! IT WASN'T MEANT TO BE LIKE THIS I WOULDN'T HAVE BROUGHT YOU IF I HAD KNOWN THIS WOULD BE YOUR F8, M8!! Oe noe, what have I done?? Christmas is being destroyed all around me, SNowman has either teleported out of the universe somehow, or has otherwise been reduced to an event horizon, a sort of festive black hole that is sucking in all around it, and my gr8 m8s been sucked into abject oblivion!! It is the end of December days!! The whole world is christmassily ending and the Mecha Snatter is the harbinger of this final dark yuley doom! He's already smashing the place up and shooting people with big bursts of light that disintegreat them into puffs of awful dust!! THis is hideous! I can't believe how horrible this is aaaaagghhh aaAAAGGGGHHHHHH the WHOLE EVERYTHING is being sucked into that tiny little shape now!! SNOWMANNE WHAT DID YOU DO?? we're getting sucked in and crushed and destroyed!!! aaaaaeeeaeuuuu!!! M8s, if you can hear me, I will try and save us somehow! I will try and make this right!! 
Buml0r fucked around with this message at Dec 22, 2007 around 22:17
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 21:59 |
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It was always my dreem to be part of a singularitude
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 22:34 |
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D: ohh buml0r, I ain't never agreed to this! what will me mum think
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 22:46 |
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Buml0re this may be beyond even your powers to save us! I'm kinda happy here in singyuleareity with snowmane, though, I think.
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 22:48 |
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It was all worth it for ceeing the wiggle he, m8.
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 22:50 |
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's k. 's alredy best snatterday evar 
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| # ? Dec 22, 2007 23:23 |
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Wat would happen if snattar and anti-snatter touch each other? But it's too late, the evil chrismabot is here :O Maybe robot will be sucked into the quantum chocolate-space!
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| # ? Dec 23, 2007 00:11 |
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Noooooooooooooooooooooo!  Can we ate the qyantum choklit as we get suked itno it?
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| # ? Dec 23, 2007 01:23 |
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| # ? Dec 23, 2007 03:00 |
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The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Advent calendar again! Let's open more dores!